awaken

as the dark falls, and while the silence is starting to engulf me, i lay awake in bed, battling with my conscience arguing with my thoughts. no alcohol for a couple of months now, no stimulants too, yet i cant sleep. then i told myself, what is this urge that im feeling? i wanted to scream, i wanted to run, i wanted to cry.
everything went black, i couldnt feel my toes anymore, it was as if the night's cold was embracing me. but i am alone.
broken and damaged, that's what i thought i was. my yesterday's dreams haunt me, asking me to come back. i reached for it, but my hands are frozen. so i turned away from my yesterday's dreams. i saw a young boy, desperately crying. it was his tears that was so cold. "what's wrong?" i said, but when he looked at me, i was stunned, all i see if his eyes! tears came running down my cheeks. tears as cold as hell!
my tears started to fall faster than the rain! the boy asked, "what are you doing to me? why are you hurting me? how long do you think should i be waiting here?".
"i... i'm sorry" i stammered, as my thoughts where fleeting in my vocabulary searching for the right words to say. "i'm sorry." those were the words that i can come up with. the only word i knew! and he understood.
but that wasnt enough, he hugged me, and everything felt warm, like sunshine on early morning. i saw his face, his sad face, and then my head started to hurt, it was like having my brains ripped off and in search of some memories inside it. then i realized who the boy was.
i've seen him in my dream, i have touched his face, i used to make him smile. i couldnt find any reason why i couldnt recognize my dream. he was my dream. his wings are withered and his feet is wounded.
"where were you? you never came back!" he said. "sorry", i replied. i hugged him back. "Shut up!" as he hugged me tighter. "i'll wait for you" those were his last words, then he vanished.
i was back in bed with a wet pillow.. my dream came to visit me and woke me up. "i am not perfect", that's what i first said to myself. but i know, he's waiting.